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1. Allison. Because she’s whimsical, lovely, a great conversationalist, and can nearly bust my gut with her humor.
2. Sam Johnson. Because he’s one of the funniest guys I’ve never met, and he’s just an all-around nice guy.
3. Jen. Because she’s one of the most opinionated, smart, and passionate young ladies I’ve ever encountered. And I want to stay on her good side, because I suspect that people who wind up on her BAD side will live to regret it.
4. Kim. Because his sense of humor is…is…well, you know. He’s one sick puppy, and I mean that purely in the best sense.
5. Lachlan. Because she is peppy, witty, has good taste, and is very good with words.
6. Dave. Because I’ve been reading his stuff for many years, and he’s wonderfully smart with a great sense of pop sensibility. And with a name like Dave, you know he’s a good guy.
7. Miz B (aka Bayou). Because she’s cool. ‘Nuff said.
8. James. Because I’ve been reading him for years, too, and he’s one of those rock-solid kind of friends that are few & far between. Besides, he could double as a security guard for our dinner party.
9. Liv. Because I absolutely adore the way she writes, her passion for certain things, and her naming of her dog “Moo.”

Damn. I ran out of seats before I ran out of blog-buddies. Not to worry, though — if your name isn’t listed in the nine above, I assure you that you are #10. Really.

And didja notice that I arranged the seating boy/girl/boy/girl?

Now comes the follow-on question: what to serve at this dinner?

What is the last book you read? The last fiction book that I read was “Fool On The Hill” by Matt Ruff; it was my annual re-reading of it. For non-fiction, I’ve been reading several different Montana-based books (history, places, etc).

How would you rate it on a scale of 1 to 10? I give this one an eight…maybe nine. Truly a book like no other; it is enchanting, whimsical, creative, and most of all, makes me want to meet the characters.

Who is your favorite author(s)? Aye carumba…for fiction, it used to be Piers Anthony…sure, a lot of his stuff is nothing more than juvenile punnery, but some of his stuff has stayed with me for decades: the first three books in the Xanth series, “On A Pale Horse,” and even a couple of the Adept books. For slightly deeper reading, I usually return to Ayn Rand, Lawrence Sanders, or sometimes medical thrillers.

What is the best book(s) you have ever read? “The Fountainhead” and “A Spell For Chameleon” and “Fool On The Hill”

Do you prefer fiction or non-fiction? Phft…you can’t make a choice like that — they each serve very different purposes. I enjoy both.

Well, today it was my turn to be surprised…I heard the song “Rock-n-Roll Heaven,” and realized that I had no idea who performed it. I hadn’t heard this song in years, but hearing it today was pretty cool — not a bad song. For some reason, I had long assumed that Elvis Presley had been involved with the recording, but the longer I listened this evening the more convinced I became that it was not Elvis. So, again, I dialed up the radio station and was shocked to learn that it was The Righteous Brothers — an act that I have never been particularly fond of. The droning monotony of their hits “Unchained Melody” and “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling” nearly render me unconscious, so it was very cool to hear this pretty peppy song from them. Color me surprised.

But on a much stranger note, I discovered Mrs Eastwood’s age via a search result that lead me to the “no marriage” site. If you are easily offended by gender stereotyping, strong NSFW (Not Safe For Work) language, and broad, negative connotations, do not click here. I didn’t know if the “nomarriage” site was serious, so I poked around and found out that it is, indeed, serious — and maddening:

An American woman has several fundamental problems that will never go away and that will get much worse a few years after she is married:

1. Her inherent anti-male bias and pre-occupation with fairness that was drilled into her at high school, college, and through the media.
2. Her self-centeredness, her ridiculously high expectations, her sense of entitlement, her high-maintenance, superficial, and stuck up attitude, her snootiness and her sense of superiority.
3. Her general mental instability and psychological disorders.
4. Her using sex as a weapon and reward to get things.

Foreign women generally don’t have any of these problems. Marrying an American woman simply does not make sense. Dating or being married to an American woman is like driving a beat-up Ford Escort. If you are only used to driving a beat-up Ford Escort, then you have no idea what it feels like when you drive a Bentley or Ferrari.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I can’t make this stuff up.